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Christmas Jokes and Riddles

See if you can figure out the answers to these silly Christmas
jokes and riddles. If you get stumped, just click "View Answer".

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
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Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters?
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What do you get if you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?
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What did the big candle say to the little candles?
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What illness do you get from eating Christmas decorations?
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Why do mummies like Christmas presents so much?
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How do Christmas trees keep their breath fresh?
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What do you call an old snowman?
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What do elves learn in school?
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What do monekys sing at Christmas time?
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What do get if you cross St. Nicholas with a detective?
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What are people who are afraid of Santa Claus called?
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Who is never hungry at Christmas time?
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What did Santa Claus say to the over-stressed snowman?
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How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
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Do Christmas trees knit?
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Who gives presents to baby sharks?
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Why was Santa's assistant depressed?
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What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
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What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
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What do you call a really quiet armed crusader?
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Why does Santa Claus have three gardens?
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Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
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If athletes get Athletes Foot, what do astronauts get?
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What did the guests sing at the Eskimo Christmas party?
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What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
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What did Santa shout to all of his toys on Christmas Eve?
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Why did the elf spell Christmas N-O-E?
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What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
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What happened when the snowwoman got angry with the snowman?
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What is a snowman's favorite dinner?
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What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
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What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
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What do you call a snowman party?
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What do vampires put on their turkey?
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Why did they let the turkey join the band?
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What do you get when you cross reindeer with cows?
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What do you get when you cross Christmas Eve with tied up rope?
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Why did Santa Claus get a ticket on Christmas Eve?
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Why does Rudolph do so well in school?
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What do you call a Christmas tree with a really big nose?
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Where do they film movies about Christmas trees?
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What is Santa Claus' favorite sandwich?
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Where does Santa Claus hang his suit after Christmas?
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How do fish celebrate Christmas?
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How do you decorate a canoe for Christmas?
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What do grizzly bears drape on their Christmas trees?
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What is a wolf's favorite Christmas carol?
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What is the favorite Mexican food of snowmen?
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What did the spider request for Christmas?
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What's purple and says "Ho, Ho, Ho"?
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When does Christmas come before Thanksgiving?
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Why does Santa Claus like going down the chimney?
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What is a dog's favorite Christmas carol?
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What did one Christmas angel say to the other?
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What do angry mice send to each other at Christmas time?
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Christmas Knock Knock Jokes

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Holly.
Holly who?
Holly-days are here again!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Mary.
Mary who?
Mary Christmas!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use. I can't remember my name!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Irish.
Irish who?
Irish you a Merry Christmas!

Christmas Humor for Grown-ups

What if it had been the Three Wise Women instead of the Three Wise Men?
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Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
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Santa Claus, an honest politician and a kind lawyer were all on an elevator together when they spotted a $5 bill lying on the floor. Who picked it up?
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